Michelle Obama died and went to heaven.
As she stood in front of Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates, she saw a huge wall of clocks behind him. Naturally, she asked, “What are all those clocks?”
“Those are Lie-Clocks,” Saint Peter answered. “Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move.”
“Oh,” said Michelle, “whose clock is that?”
“That’s Mother Teresa’s. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie.”
“Whose clock is that?” she asked again.
“That’s Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands have only moved twice, telling us that Abe only told two lies in his entire life.”
“Where’s my husband’s clock?” Michelle asked.
“Barack’s clock is in Jesus’ office,” Saint Peter responded. “He’s using it as a ceiling fan.”